Thursday, September 30, 2010

A Little Realness

this is my fake blog.. ha! it really is.. I only write the good stuff on here because it's not private..

My other one is too viscous though.. Frank's unemployment ran out 9 or 10 weeks ago.. and I did great being supportive for a while.. but the past two weeks have not been pleasant.. at all..

I'm pretty good about not fighting in front of the kids.. not that we even hardly argue.. but if I'm cranky or he is one day.. I usually just stay mute to defuse the situation and a few minutes later.. it's all good..

But not lately.. I'm screaming at the kids.. truth be told.. I'm even cursing.. If Frank pisses me off even a little bit.. I bring up his unemployment.. which he's already bummed about.. and it's not like he's not looking.. I just get ticked he's not looking more!

Then I regret it.. and he totally forgives me because he feels he put us in this shitty situation.. but I hate adding to his stress..

*sigh*

It's been a rough two years.. that's how long he was on unemployment.. he thought it'd be sooooo easy to get a job.. I am pretty sour about it all.. I so want to go off on him right now.. not in person.. just on the blog.. but.. his mother reads this for updates on the kids.. lol.. (Hi Carol! Thanks for helping us out!)

And then it's like.. why fight and stress because it is going to end soon.. it's to the point where if he needs to take two jobs that pay crap.. he will.. but I don't think it'll come to that.. he drove trucks at his last job.. and he's been doing construction for ever.. so I'm sure he'll find something along those lines.. although I thought that for the past two months..

I just don't want it to be like.. he gets a job and then I'm like .. oh, well in that case I'll be nice again.. I want to be nice even when the bad times are here..

I can't wait to see what God has for our future.. I really hope it's not a crap job.. I'd hate for him to have to commute an hour away.. or make crap pay that doesn't make it worth his time.. He'll take anything that pays the bills.. I just want him to have some left over being as he's going to be working his tail off for it.. am I asking too much? So many people are dealing with true tragedies and I want Frank's commute to be comfortable and for him to not only pay the bills, but have extra money too..

I don't pray often.. I just don't get it.. How can I possibly feel comfortable asking God for anything when so many people have it so much worse.. like how dare I ask for MORE than I already have? Plus, another thing I don't get is.. God has it all figured out.. He has a plan for us.. so why ask for favors.. when maybe what I should be doing is waiting patiently for His plan to play out, no? yeah.. I don't get that.. plus.. what do you say?!? All I ever say is Thank You.. and then I list what I'm thankful for.. anywho.. I should get some rest..

Happy October Eve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Nine Year Anniversary

Today is my nine year dating anniversary.. I wonder if many people celebrate their "dating" anniversary.. I don't think too many people do because my girlfriends and my mom make fun of me for it.. but the hubs is totally down so.. we do..

Yeah so.. yesterday Frank comes home with a huge bouquet of flowers.. balloons.. and a heart shaped plaque that reads "The Love of My Life".. and actually I totally forgot about our anniversary.. which is so out of character for me.. in fact this was the first time I've ever forgotten any (we have 3) anniversary.. I thought he was just being nice.. then I read the balloons.. how funny right?! Normally people get in trouble for forgetting an anniversary, but Frank liked it.. he had one up on me..

I can't believe we've been together for NINE years!! We got married less than 3 months after our first date.. insane.. and THEN.. we packed up all our belongings, my son, and my dog and got into a U-Haul and drove south.. without a destination!!! Our parents were none too pleased to say the least.. what a crazy time!

But here we are.. more in love than ever.. sappy sap sap I know.. but it's true.. even though I wanna punch him in the face sometimes.. hahaha..

*WINK*

ok.. I was ganna end it there.. but I have GOT to explain the *WINK*

September 22, 2001.. Frank and I were both stationed at Fort Meade, MD.. he had been recently assigned to the office I worked in.. he came up to me and handed me a yellow sticky with his phone number on it.. and said sutten like.. if you ever wanna hang out.. give me a call..

So I did what any girl propositioned with a hotties number would do.. I called two of my guy friends and asked them to come over that night to play cards.. then called Frank and was like.. heyyyy.. I'm having some people over tonight if you wanna come by.. ha! It was all a set up..

So the four of us hung out.. playing cards and drinking some.. and the other two guys eventually crashed.. but Frank and I stayed up all night getting to know one another.. we kissed here and there.. but I was so guarded.. he was SO cute.. I just knew he only wanted one thing.. because I was so insecure I didn't believe he could actually like me.. and then.. somewhere in the wee hours he said.. I think I'm falling in love with you.. and that was it.. I was irate! actually.. I was more humilated.. because what a BS line.. that just proved he only wanted one thing! I kept telling him to shut up and said "You're just drunk!" even though I knew he wasn't because we didn't even drink that much.. and he was like.. no seriously.. so to end the awkwardness I just said.. ok, if you still feel the same way tomorrow.. tell me then..

And he said.. How about I'll wink at you! I'm like what?.. and he insisted that he would wink at me the next day.. and that would prove that he was falling for me.. so whatever.. we eventually fell asleep.. and the next day at the office.. I REFUSED to look at him.. because then what if he thought "OMG.. does she really think I was serious? What a dork!" haha.. He tried making eye contact with me, but I was avoiding it like the plague!

So he sent me an email.. and all it said was:

*WINK*

We eloped less than 12 weeks later.. and here we are.. NINE YEARS LATER!!