Saturday, April 3, 2010

My bad..

I hate guilt.. and I am pretty full of it at the moment.. though I am fervently talking myself out of it.. I was wrong.. I definitely was.. BUT I am REALLY regretful and sorry for what I did.. I mean truly, 100% feel like a total loser for what I did.. and since I'm so sincere.. I think God has forgiven me.. well, I'm sincere.. AND I promised God I won't cause any more problems..

Oh, I'm speaking of encounter #2 with the crazy neighbor guy.. the first encounter since our little run in.. you know the one where he yelled at my children because they were trying to break into his car.. *shakes head*

I ran into him and his wife at the store and I made a point to stare him down with the evil eye as I got closer and eventually I was sort of all up in his face.. THEN.. when we were about 30 feet away I said in an extra loud voice to Frank "That was him!" and Frank goes "Who?" and I said "The fat ugly neighbor guy!"

How childish.. and ridiculous.. and mean of me.. I really hope he didn't hear me.. Although I'm sure his ears were paying extra attention to what I said I walked away since I got especially close with my nasty attitude all up in his face..

Even if I didn't say that nasty comment.. I would feel bad JUST for getting in his face with a nasty look.. even that is ridiculous.. ho hum..

I'm such a loser.. dork.. rude.. meany.. I mean he was way outta line that day.. but still.. I took it too far tonight.. trying to make him feel stupid?? I mean seriously what is wrong with me??

But I have to let the guilt go.. I believe guilt is a tool of the devil.. I AM remorseful.. and I will never give my neighbor any more negative vibes.. and for that I think God forgives me.. so I have to forgive myself.. sorry Mr. Neighbor Guy..

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